A photo-taking hiatus

Sometimes, life just happens.

My 2024 started out strong in regards to photography. I had just bought myself a Fuji X-T30 for Christmas and it quickly became my edc. It became my set of eyes for lot of places this year: the Bahamas, west coast beaches, downtown urban environments, Vegas, Thailand, Singapore, the Philippines, South Korea, and Japan.

I came home from a two-month trip in Southeast Asia with unforgettable experiences and a full hard drive. But ever since then, I haven't felt that irresistible urge to shoot. Normally I'm ecstatic about taking a setup with me anywhere and everywhere, but it's as if that urge has been asleep for months. It feels like an important piece of my life is on pause.

And I'm really sad about it.

Maybe I'm dreading going through an enormous pile of photos to edit because it seems like a lot of work.

Or maybe it's because I switched to a different editing software, needing to adjust to some differences.

Perhaps the thought of Meta using our photos (with no option to decline) feels like a huge loss of control.

It could even be because I'm racking up too many concepts I want to execute, without the proper space to do them.

It could be a mix of these reasons.

But another pressing reality is that... I've been feeling a heavy cloud settling over my head. Unfortunately it's been quite a weight, sapping the energy from my bones. This cloud is nothing new to me, and normally I carry it just fine. In fact, picking up photography had lifted this cloud when it was at its thickest. This time, however, it's pervasive enough to affect my photography itself.

"Melancholy," 2023

A few favorites taken with my Fuji X-T30

A lot of my creative self portrait work touches on mental health as it's an incredibly important topic to me. Right now, it seems like I need to follow some of my own concepts and be kind to myself.

It's necessary to create room for optimism, especially when life feels rough. So on the bright side, I've been filling up my time with other creative endeavors like playing musical instruments, dabbling in crafts, reading books, and writing poetry. These hobbies also bring me a lot of joy.

Because the truth is that my cameras will still be there. My gear isn't going anywhere. I don't know how long until this cloud clears enough for me to venture out with my cameras and that irrefutable drive to shoot again, but in the meantime I am going to sit back and admire other photographers' work while tending to my other fulfilling hobbies.

I'll be back at it again soon.

Peace and love,